“I cried when I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet.”

Some of my patients have told me that knowing others have worse problems than their own helps them put their pain into perspective and offers at least some consolation. I think that taking this attitude is a good strategy to help cope with pain. But there may be a catch to adopting such a point of view. Let me draw an analogy to explain.

In terms of economic opportunity, social justice, health care and individual freedom, Canada does well compared to many countries in the world. It would be foolish however for us to become smug or complacent about this because we still have serious problems. Just because we may be better off than others does not justify ignoring all the things that are wrong in our country or use that as an excuse to avoid dealing with our problems.

With chronic pain I think it is vital for affected individuals to gain perspective on their condition. The realization that others are worse off can help greatly in this. Without a clear and honest perspective on one’s pain, the task of coping with it is that much harder. Any consolation for one’s pain is better than no consolation at all. However, I believe that the positive effect of consolation should be used to energize efforts to improve – not as a reason to avoid effort.

Pain and suffering affect all human beings. Comparing one’s own to that of others may be of value if it leads to improvement but comparisons of this kind are always highly personal. We can never really know what someone else feels. Perhaps therefore, we should remember to work on ourselves even as we feel compassion for others. After all, someone else’s pain may be better or worse than yours but you still have pain and you still need to deal with it every day.